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Thread: Pigtown Gazette

  1. #1

    Pigtown Gazette

    Excitement was in the air as the team formerly known as the Highland Trojans prepared to play the 2091 season opener in its new home and with its new name – the Pigtown Engineers.

    The team traveled to the opener in grand style, boarding the Mile One Express at the nearby B&O Railroad Museum to travel the first mile of commercial railroad track laid in America. Upon arriving at Carroll Park, a German oompah band led the parade down to Kaline Field (named for local son and Baseball Hall of Famer Al Kaline) for the Opening Day ceremonies.

    Unfortunately, there was the little matter of a ballgame, and the visiting Kentucky Emeralds dampened the celebration somewhat by pounding out twelve hits in a 6-3 victory over the Engineers. Kentucky second baseman Carlos Oshea hit the first two home runs in Kaline Field history, and two Emeralds pitchers combined to scatter four singles. Nevertheless, fans enjoyed the playing of Grand Funk Railroad’s version of “The Loco-Motion” during the seventh inning stretch, the wurst served at the game was the best, and the young fans gobbled down the Good ‘N Plenty candies handed out by Choo Choo Charlie himself.

    Following the game, players and team management celebrated the new season at nearby Mobtown Ballroom. During a break in the Lindy Hop dancing, the Promotions and Marketing Team announced the debut of the commemorative “2091 Sooo-EEY! Tour” schedule t-shirt. Available in Adult(*) and children’s sizes! Shop early for best selection!

    (*) -- Extra charge for extended adult sizes

    “Pigtown Engineers Baseball – We’re E-I-E-I-O and One!”

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Bunch, Oklahoma
    Posts
    7,401

    Re: Pigtown Gazette

    I love it.
    Peace. (Psalm 29:11)

    Darrel
    Oklahoma

  3. #3

    Re: Pigtown Gazette

    At a hastily-called news conference at nearby Mobtown Ballroom (Official Dance Hall of the Pigtown Engineers) the team formally announced the players selected in the 2091 amateur draft.

    Round 1 – C Herbert Chandler “He definitely fills a need for us down the road. We weren’t sure we would get the chance to pick him, but all it takes is a team or two to do the unexpected and there you go. Our turn came up, he was still available and there you go!

    Round 2 – P Angel Ray “Not sure yet if he’s going to be a starter or long reliever. Again, not someone we necessarily thought would be available.”

    Round 3 – P Ricky Marquez “Took a flyer on him. At that point in the proceedings sometimes you’d pick your own mother if it’ll get you closer to the end of the draft, but he has more potential on the mound than her. Closer than you’d think, though.”

    The Promotions and Marketing Department took the opportunity to announce that Mobtown Ballroom would be the sponsor for an upcoming Guinness World Record attempt at Kaline Field. At an upcoming game (TBD) the seventh-inning stretch music – “Locomotion” by Grand Funk Railroad – will be played after the game as fans are invited on the field in an attempt to break the record for the world’s longest dance line. Ten lucky fans will be chosen at random to receive complimentary swing dance lessons from Mobtown Ballroom! Don’t miss it!

    “Pigtown Engineers Baseball – You Gotta Swing Your Hips Now….”

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    11,996

    Re: Pigtown Gazette

    I gotta go with Little Eva on the Locomotion. I once dated her...in a fantasy world!

  5. #5

    Re: Pigtown Gazette

    Quote Originally Posted by kniman View Post
    I gotta go with Little Eva on the Locomotion. I once dated her...in a fantasy world!
    A fine version indeed, and one that gets utilized at Kaline Field on special occasions such as 60's Night.

    We also have the Kylie Minogue version for 80's Night, and the version done by Atomic Kitten (for the Thomas the Tank Engine soundtrack) for 90's Night and Kid's Night.

    But when your team is the Engineers and your ballpark borders historical train tracks, the Railroad wins the tie-breaker.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Posts
    11,996

    Re: Pigtown Gazette

    Point made!

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